The Daily Distress is not at all proud to announce its new columnist, minor celebrity gobshite Katie Bobbins.
Katie’s views are so extreme that she’s even been banned from social media sites.
The Distress, however, believes in free speech, so let’s listen to the racist bitch with an open mind.
We apologise in advance for everything that she’s about to say.
Over to you, Katie:
Well, what a week it has been!
Can you believe it? I have had my Twitface account closed down for some minor infraction.
I was merely raising a highly reasoned objection to some non-Caucasian non-entity insisting that “underprivileged” children should be fed. Fed by me and you! With our money!
Are these grubby infants incapable of landing a column in The Daily Mail like normal people? Can these diminutive delinquents no longer find work in the coal mines? Do chimneys no longer require cleaning?
Apparently, one can no longer object to feral, little rats getting their daily rations. Even if many of those vile, verminous sprogs are decidedly off-white.
Oh no! That would be “racist”, wouldn’t it?
Can you believe that?
But the truth remains: feed an orphan, feed a future criminal.
There, I’ve said it!
It’s Political Correctness Gone Mad!
It was bad enough when they stopped us throwing stones at cripples. This time, however, they have gone too far! I cannot stand by silently while my God-given right to hate lesser people is cruelly denied.
All around me, I find people turning their backs on their glorious white English heritage.
Accursed lesbian freaks stalk the streets, trying to get their filthy, perverted paws on my pert, alabaster breasts.
Dangerous liberals wander free, reading their so-called books and questioning the will of our Etonian overlords.
Even the police refuse to arrest Muslims for praying!
This Sceptered Isle is GOING TO THE DOGS!
And then, to cap it all off, some piece of sub-human slime has had the nerve to vandalise the statue of Mussolini in my front garden! How dare they insult Il Douche!
Well, as far as I’m concerned, an Englishwoman’s home is her fuhrer-bunker and its sanctity is not up for debate. I will continue to display tributes to my Aryan heroes and no untermensch dirt-bag will stop me.
Rise up with Katie Bobbins!
The 87.2% of British people who are white are clearly in the minority now. And we must fight back before it’s too late.
Will you join me in my crusade to restore our nation to global supremacy and elect Katie Bobbins as life-time fuhrer?
My sword shall not sleep in my hand until Johnny Foreigner has been thoroughly reminded of his place.
And remember: Ein Volk! Ein Reich! Ein Katie!
More pearls of wit, wisdom and insight from Katie will follow as soon as we can afford the legal fees.