Satire

The Daily Distress’s satirical articles.

There’s no need to get triggered by anything, we target extremists and idiots of all political persuasions. Left or right.

If you worship any particular politician, don’t read what we have to say about him or her. Your time would be better spent either finding an article about one that you don’t like or seeing a psychiatrist about your self-esteem issues. Either are good but one is free and the other is stupidly expensive, so do the first one.

countdown susie dent and paul zenon

Countdown Conundrum – Is Channel 4 Brainwashing Our Grannies?

Countdown, Channel 4’s long-running, mid-afternoon gameshow would, at first sight, seem to be the most harmless show on television. The game, which involves solving word puzzles and doing sums, has long been seen as harmless entertainment for the old and the unemployable. But could a sinister secret be lurking behind the Countdown Conundrum? Former actor …

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brit trek christmas special daily distress satire

Brit Trek – Christmas Special

In the last, thrilling episode of Brit Trek, the insipid Captain Berk and his disloyal crew got caught up in a tacky reconstruction of Apocalypse Now and made a dark pact with Colonel Cummings. This ongoing story-arc may or may not be revisited at some point in the future. In the meantime, we find the …

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british fish brexit vox pop daily distress satire

Vox Pop – British Fish on Brexit

There are plenty of strange people arguing about fish of late, but what do our plucky, British fish think about what’s going on with all the Brexit shenanigans? In this Daily Distress vox pop special, we send our intrepid underwater reporter, Jack Clouseau out on the sub-aquatic streets to find out what the nation’s embattled …

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the crap brexit sketch daily distress monty pythin

The Crap Brexit Sketch

With sincere apologies to Monty Python, The Daily Distress proudly presents the Crap Brexit Sketch. Please note that there is some mild swearing. [A CUSTOMER ENTERS A SHOP] Mr. Praline: ’Ello, I wish to register a complaint. [THE OWNER, WHOSE NAME IS BORIS, IGNORES HIM] Mr. Praline: ’Ello, Miss? Boris: What do you mean “Miss?” Mr. Praline: I’m sorry, …

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the apprentice political special daily distress satire

The Apprentice Political Special

For obvious reasons, the BBC was unable to make the traditional Autumn series of The Apprentice this year. Unable to afford celebrities and scared to endanger civilian lives, the nation’s broadcaster of hearts was forced to resort to having politicians as contestants. The Apprentice Political Special followed the traditional format of the show with suitably …

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abolish the driving license lance flitwitt daily distress

Libertarian Party Calls for End of Evil UK Driving License

The UK’s Auction Party which styles itself on the right-wing US Libertarian Party has called for the abolition of the British driving license. Former actor turned political activist, Lance Flitwitt tells Daily Distress readers why he believes that the driving license represents an unnecessary layer of bureaucracy. The Chase As a seventeen-year-old, my greatest ambition …

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