Satire

The Daily Distress’s satirical articles.

There’s no need to get triggered by anything, we target extremists and idiots of all political persuasions. Left or right.

If you worship any particular politician, don’t read what we have to say about him or her. Your time would be better spent either finding an article about one that you don’t like or seeing a psychiatrist about your self-esteem issues. Either are good but one is free and the other is stupidly expensive, so do the first one.

Barnstoneworth Independence Party

Barnstoneworth Independence Party

Could Barnstoneworth be set to declare its independence from the UK? The Barnstoneworth Independence Party and their leader, Jack “Wolfy” Ramsbottom hope so. In an exclusive interview with The Daily Distress, Ramsbottom tells us how a dispute with the Yorkshire Cribbage League could develop into a seismic wave that will strike at the heart of …

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war with germxny

War With Germxny

Mr Chamberlain Declares War on the Germxns Following demands that the entirely gender-neutral word German lost one of its vowels in order to become the somehow even more ungendered Germxn, the Germxns dug their heels in. With no undertaking received from Herr Hitler that Germxny would give up its “a”, Neville Chamberlain’s hand was finally …

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Brit Trek The Fedexit Years

Brit Trek – Fedexit

PREVIOUSLY ON BRIT TREK: The Spivship Enterprise crashed into a different TV franchise after Captain Berk rather foolishly allowed Ensign Schapps to have a go at navigating. Our clueless, spaffaholics are now trapped on a mysterious island in the Pacific and have even less of an idea than usual what’s going on. In the Lost …

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