Big Chief ICU here with a great new challenge for young spotters everywhere!
I hope you’ve all been busy completing my previous missions such as:
- Big Chief ICU’s Takeaway Food Wrappers of the British Isles
- Big Chief ICU’s Industrial Waste of the West Midlands
- Big Chief ICU’s Guide to Dogs’ Eggs
- Big Chief ICU’s Treasury of ‘Phone Box Adverts
- Big Chief ICU’s Horse Racing Secrets
All of which are freely available if you send me a postal order for a shilling per book and a large stamped, addressed envelope.
The British Isles are home to all sorts of silly billies, daft ha’porths and clueless wallies, but how well do you know one from another?
It’s time to sharpen up your scouting skills with my brand new collection, Twats of the British Isles. It’s heap big fun for warriors of all ages from eight upwards!
Will you be the first one in your tribe to spot them all?
5 points: Pavement parkers
10 points: Silly twattoos
20 points: Private number plates
25 points: Living statues
30 points: Street Preachers
Keep your eagle-eyes peeled for Part 2 where we’ll be looking for all sorts of lame-brains including suburban “gangstas”, people who go to cricket matches in fancy dress and those incurable nincompoops who ride around on children’s scooters even though they left school several years ago.
Happy hunting, young braves!
P.S. I have a solid-gold tip the 3:30 at Wincanton next Thursday. It’s from a very good source with direct access to the stable. I will happily share my fortune with you, my young friends, as long as you make a scout’s promise to place an extra sixpence at the Turf Accountant’s and send the proceeds to me.
Have you promised? Good. In that case, put everything you can find on Diesel Dobbin and take an early price because it’s going to be a steamer. You heard it here, first.
And here’s a very special ‘thank you’ to all the boys and girls who share last week’s success with me on l’Escargot in the National: an extremely rare MegaTrump!